Book Review - Parenting Champions

Lanny Bassham’s first book, With Winning in Mind, swept the country a couple of years ago. I read it at the time, like most serious shooters, but it didn’t quite resonate with me. Mostly because it was written with, well, Winning in Mind. And not everybody is competing to be part of the top 5% that wins 95% at the time. Or, more accurately, we are “competing to win” in other aspects of our lives, - our careers or family - with shooting playing a supporting role. For me, that supporting role does not only mean recharging my batteries but also learning something that I can take over to my day-to-day life.

And that is where this book, Parenting Champions, slots in.

Introduction

I stumbled upon the book while looking for something else and, as you can see in the first paragraph, I didn’t quite expect to be drawn to it. But this sentence had me sit up and take notice:

“What is more important to you, what your children Accomplish or what they Become?”

That is not to say that Bassham embraces the millennial practice of eliminating losing. He just pushes you to turn your child’s loss into a learning experience. Relentlessly so. Because “life is one big competition”.

Lanny who?

Lanny Bassham is an Olympic gold medallist and won his medal in rifle shooting. Bassham has an intense interest in the mental aspect of the shooting game. His own accomplishments allowed him access to other top performers and, for a period of two years, he interviewed champions from various sports. Learning not only what they do, but how they think. And after he captured that in his Mental Management System, he got to work with even more five percenters, from Miss USA winners to Navy SEAL teams.

With Winning in Mind was born out of this study. And, in the later years of his life, he turned towards parents and schools.

Parenting

“Let’s get one thing straight! As long as your children are living at home, you are in charge of their mental skill development.”

Teachers and coaches teach sport-specific skills that you normally can’t, but they simply don’t spend enough time with your child to take care of the mental aspects.

I found the book easy to read, fast paced and it had me making mental notes. It is the kind of read that has you pausing ever-so-often to contemplate the relevance of the information to your own life.

The book is bursting with frameworks and models to help you think about the task at hand clearly. These normally take the form of:

• There is a difference between X and Y.
• If X, then this, but if Y then that.
• This is how you do this and how you do that.
• Example: what is the first thing to say to your child after a competition. (Get your answer ready; I’ll get to it.)

These frameworks are applied to a focused range of topics, including:

• Mental Management
• Goal Setting
• Performance Journal
• Self-image
• Dealing with Pressure
• What to do when things go wrong

What about your inner child?

I learned things about my own shooting while reading the book, so I believe most other people will as well. In some ways, I see this book as a prequel to With Winning in Mind. It covers a wider range of basics, where With Winning in Mind dives deep into the Mental Management System.

Conclusion

“What did you do well?” / “Tell me the best part of the game.” / “What was fun today?”

This is Bassham’s answer to what is the first thing you ask your child after a match.

The Reinforcement Phase starts immediately after the Action Phase, and that is when your child’s self-image is most susceptible to suggestion. And you want those suggestions to be positive. If you leave it to chance (“How did it go?”) most people will dwell on the negative at the time you want to do that the least.

It’s not easy, but it is practical. And if this makes sense to you, so will the rest of the book.